A good book can change your life. Photo: Slightly Everything via Flickr.

On Tuesday I wrote about just how important it is for each of us to simply stop everything sometimes, and truly take a break from everything. One of the best ways to do that is to sink in to a great book.

Though reading is a year-round pleasure, it seems to gain added momentum over the summer when weekend trips and other vacations turn our thoughts to summer reading. For some of us that means the novel of the year, what everybody is reading and raving about. For others, it’s a great time to dig into a non-fiction work, whether philosophical or self-help oriented.

So I thought I’d send out a few suggestions for the months ahead. I’d also love to hear your ideas about great summer reads, so please take a moment to make a comment on the blog or add your thoughts to our Facebook page.

Weighty tomes

Some of you may remember when I had author and teacher Charles Eisenstein on the show to discuss The Ascent of Humanity, his book on the healing crisis and reunification opportunity at the center of some of today’s biggest global problems.

His newest book is Sacred Economics, Money, Gift & Society in the Age of Transition.

Both books are truly works of synthesis that are at once unafraid of naming and dealing with major issues today — global warming, human alienation, excessive technology, banking and money run amok, among others — but which look into the heart of humanity and our spiritual truths as paths toward a new age of enlightenment waiting to be born.

Both books are also big! Ascent is 565 pages and Sacred Economics comes in at 458. But don’t let that scare you because they’re both divided into chapters that can be taken in bite-sized chews. If your taste runs toward an interest in world issues, contemporary challenges, and the role of meaningful human relations along with integrated ecological relationships, either one or both of these books make for an in depth consideration of our times yet with an uplifting groundedness that is applicable to all our lives.

Also interesting in non-fiction are The Happiness Project: Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun by Gretchen Rubin and The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide: How to Declutter, Organize, and Simplify Your Life.  Neither book is new (both from 2010), but they’re excellent reads in the “self-help” realm if you’re seeking ideas and inspiration for more balanced living.

Escapism

I sometimes wonder whether reading a novel really is escapism? After all, so many of the characters and stories in fiction reflect the tensions and complexities of human life and relationships. Even something that may be a page-turner, and read at first glance as “heavy,” might in fact be just the kind of door into our hearts and minds that unleashes our own resolution of issues. I think that’s one reason we all love a good book!

So Maine by J. Courtney Sullivan might not seem like “light summer reading,” but it is juicy summer reading when it comes to the lives of women entwined with one another through family and marriage. From Sullivan’s website there’s a synopsis:

For the Kellehers, Maine is a place where children run in packs, showers are taken outdoors, and old Irish songs are sung around a piano at night. Their beachfront property, won on a barroom bet after the war, sits on three acres of sand and pine nestled between stretches of rocky coast, with one tree bearing the initials “A.H.” At the cottage, built by Kelleher hands, cocktail hour follows morning mass, nosy grandchildren snoop in drawers, and decades-old grudges simmer beneath the surface.

The book is now a New York Times Bestseller (where you can also find other great summer reads). The Washington Post said about the book,

I enjoyed every page of this ruthless and tender novel about the way love can sometimes redeem even the most contentious families. Like all first-rate comic fiction, Maine uses humor to examine the truths of the heart, in New England and far beyond.

I think you’ll enjoy it, too.

For something a little on the lighter side but by no means lacking tension and depth is best-selling author (and Virginian) Adriana Trigiani’s The Shoemaker’s Wife, which is a sweeping historical epic and romance spanning a couple of continents and a few decades in the life of Italian-American immigrants. In the words of a friend, “A total beach read.”

What I like about it are the details and textures that arise from descriptions of place and character that really take the reader into the heart of the early twentieth century and the rapid changes that meant for people and the structure of society. (And if you love this one, pick up Big Stone Gap, Trigiani’s debut novel set in her Virginia hometown.)

If you like espionage novels you’ll probably enjoy The Expats, which has a secondary theme of marital betrayal going on. Not everyone’s cup of tea but this one is a page turner with probing insights into the nature of trust and appearance versus reality.

And for fans of travel novels I’m looking forward to July’s release of A Lady Cyclist’s Guide to Kashgar: A Novel by Suzanne Joinson. I love the idea of strangers meeting in exotic locales and discovering parts of themselves that they didn’t know existed.

But this novel in particular intrigues for its dual narratives — one set on the Silk Road in the 20s as Eva is commissioned to write a cycling guide to the area and the other in present day London when Frieda meets a lost but open Arab man and they journey off together. It will be interesting to see how these stories weave together to make a whole.

On the fiction meets non-fiction side, I want to read the 2005 book The Disobedience of the Daughter of the Sun: A Mayan Tale of Ecstasy, Time and Finding One’s True Form by Martín Prechtel. I understand that this book is wonderful for combining story and analysis into one, allowing the reader to both experience the story and explore it more in depth. I recently read Prechtel’s Secrets of the Talking Jaguar, his vivid story of life in Santiago Atitlan and the Tzutujil culture. If you love memoirs, this one is a great study in place and the coming of age of a spiritual shaman.

Also on my recent reads list are:

• The Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz
• Desert Wisdom, Neil Douglas Klotz
• Physicians of the Heart, Wali Ali Meyer, Bilal Hyde,  Faisal Muqaddim, Shabda Kahn
• Virginia’s Gardener Guide, Jacqueline Hériteau

Please send me other book ideas and do turn in this Saturday for a different kind of story with Concrete, Steel and Paint.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Maybe it's time to get away from it all, whether for a moment or a weekend. Photo: Alex_Ford via Flickr.

With summer just about a month away, and Memorial Day weekend around the corner, the itch to get away from it all is building up.

Of course, everyone needs a little downtime now and again. But with a down economy, more and more people are feeling like they can’t get away from it all. Either it’s because budgets are tighter, or because you’re feeling like you have to work twice as hard to keep and develop business that came a lot easier during boom times.

Another thing I hear people say is that right now it’s smarter to save for a rainy day and forgo the vacation this year.

But neither prudent planning nor feeling cash strapped take away the fact that really, sometimes you do have to get away from it all!

We women can be awfully hard on ourselves. We’ll multitask and give more and sacrifice our needs until we’re nearly exhausted. And then, like gluttons for punishment, we’ll do it all again.

It’s times like that when it’s important to remember that you can’t give to or do for others until you’ve cared for and nurtured yourself.

Reset

I like to remember that a “vacation” can be a minute, an hour, a day or a simple weekend if you’re present in the act of letting everything else go and just being where you are…right…now.

I want to share a few tips on how you can get away from it all without spending a fortune. You can still get the R & R that all women need even if it’s only for a moment.

First, consider those moments when you meditate, work out, or give time to a passion like gardening, reading or just relaxing with a cup of tea. If these moments have become entangled with routine in such a way that you’re just checking them off your “To Do” list, next time you go to the gym or pour that cup of tea, stop. Become aware. Tune in to your breath and thoughts and check in with your state of mind and energy.

Whatever you discover in a moment like this, let it be an opportunity to get closer to yourself and feel out your state of mind, your state of soul.

Ask yourself in that moment what you need or want. Ask yourself if you’re present or frenetic. Check in and be okay with whatever the answer is.

If something feels hurried or just “off,” come back to your breath. Come back to you.

Just a few moments of cultivating awareness like this during the week can be just the grounding you need to reawaken your commitment to yourself to be self-nurturing and present, exactly the things that can renew your joy and personal purpose in the midst of a hurried and hectic world.

Day tripper

Another way to revive your sense of personal balance, relationship balance, and/or work-life balance is to go ahead and take that day off and really let it be a day off.

Allow yourself to not only let go of work and family duties, but to drop the non-urgent tasks for another day.

Begin your day off with a relaxing and grounding meal, unhurriedly reading that article or book you’ve been dying to dig in to.

Take a yoga class or go for a run — whatever it is that lets you both burn and ground your energy.

Then play! Turn off the phone and forget the Internet and simply craft a day doing all the things you love with none of the sense of duty and “must-do” that we women so often feel.

Even if you go no further than a local spa or salon for a massage and pedicure, let yourself luxuriate in it.

But if your taste runs to something else, like pursuing your garden all day, hiking a trail, or even volunteering in a setting you can otherwise rarely visit but which would do your heart good, then do that. Just let the day be unique — and uniquely you!

A mini-break

In the UK they call it a mini-break. I always love hearing that in the English films. It’s just about hopping in the car and going far enough that you’ve gotten away, but not so far that the travel itself is exhausting.

Wherever you live there are always exciting new things to do within one to two hours drive. Whether it’s visiting a best girlfriend, antiquing in the next town, or booking a hotel for some fluffy pillows and sightseeing, it’s possible to go just a little ways but come home feeling like you’ve seen the world.

And with online businesses like Groupon and Living Social it’s possible to get some seriously amazing deals that make it more than affordable to get away in style without breaking the bank.

The key here, just as with a mere moment of breathing, is to let yourself explore and experience in a relaxed way. Don’t make a huge agenda, just enough to feel like you’ve seen something new — or revisited somewhere comfortingly familiar — in a way that leaves you uplifted and restored.

Too often we have to give ourselves permission to take breaks, whether three minutes, three hours, or three days. I wish it wasn’t that way. I wish every woman would feel she needs and deserves renewal in a way that doesn’t require twisting her own arm into it.

I know that you need a little downtime. Give it to yourself. And luxuriate in it.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

You can find out more about David at davidtoscano.com.

From A Race via Flickr

In the movie Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Indie has to step off a cliff into what appears to be empty space and a certain death below. His feet do land on solid ground (the emptiness turns out to be an optical illusion) and is saved for the fourth and final installment. In a less dramatic, but no less frightening fashion, every year millions of people take such leaps of faith in their own lives. Getting married, buying a home, having a baby, going to college, leaving college for a full time job; all of these, when done for the first time, can require overcoming some degree of fear (small or great)  of the unknown.

This morning I am joined by three young women who will be graduating from JMU this spring and beginning a brand new journey. In the spirit of full disclosure I should tell you that all of them are interns for Real Life with Jennifer Till and while it is not a condition for the position, all of their names begin with the letter J, as does mine.

They are: Jenna Stone, Jessica Thatcher and Jami Limon.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

Real Life Interns Jami Limon, Jenna Stone and Jessica Thatcher.

As any parent knows, watching your child move from one stage of life to the next is bittersweet.

On one hand you feel some pangs of sadness to see them leave behind certain ways of doing things that are right for one stage. But on the other it’s a delight to see them master bigger challenges and develop tastes and interests uniquely their own.

Of the many stages — from babyhood to toddling, from small child to gangly teen, from graduating senior to young adult — none may be so mysterious as when they truly set off into the adventure of full fledged adulthood.

It takes a village

Now, it may not be a perfect analogy to talk about my recent interns in this way. After all, I didn’t bring them up from babyhood. But I have worked with them during their final stages of undergraduate study and here they are now on the precipice of their adult futures, gazing out at the world beyond.

I can’t help but be bittersweet…and yet intrigued.

No, I’m not their parent, but they have become beloved to me in so many ways. And like a parent (but also as a communications professional), I’m eagerly interested in what’s next for them and looking forward to what amazing women each will become.

Actually, I should say what even more amazing women they will become as they already have accomplished so much. Each is filled with an enthusiasm, drive and professionalism that is matched only by how much intelligence, heart, and soul they bring to their endeavors.

Show time

I’ve had the pleasure of working with James Madison University students Jenna Stone, Jessica Thatcher, and Jami Limon (collectively and affectionately known as The J Team) during their Internships with the Real Life with Jennifer Till show and indeed, the pleasure has been mine.

With fresh ideas and approaches, each young woman has contributed significantly to the growth and development of the show, including teaching me many things about communications today. It’s such a delight for me to have students as part of my life for the richness and open perspective they bring.

Recently, I had Intern Jami Limon on the show to talk about her studies concerning The Lost Boys of Sudan. This week we triple the pleasure by talking with all three departing Interns about their time working on the show and what’s next for them as they step into the unknown.

Join me this Saturday to hear their takes, and gain a window into the lives of three young women who are ready to fly the nest.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Visual journaling allows you to play with ideas. Photo: Abecedarian Gallery via Flickr.

Have you ever heard the phrase, “Don’t think it, ink it?” It’s an idea used mostly for writers, but also for anyone trying to solve a problem, brainstorm, or launch a creative project.

The basic premise is that when we get a good idea that we think we may like to pursue, we’ll get farther in bringing the idea to fruition if we start taking down notes, filling in details, and giving the idea some initial structure on which to build.

It’s curious to contrast this with creative visualization, which says that we can also solve problems, manifest events, and even cure illness by entering into a meditative state and seeing in our mind’s eye the thing we intend to accomplish in brilliant detail and as if it had already happened.

This is a wonderful technique and very powerful. But there is a danger present there, too. I’d call it the fine line between intentional, mindful focus, and wishful or magical thinking; that if you just think about it enough, and see it enough, you’ll get it — whether that “get” is a healing or a Gucci bag.

The thing is that we don’t have to chose one or the other technique as the only “right” path to success. We can visualize and we can take notes. But more than that, we can combine the two in visual journaling to have the best of both worlds, where the power of our mental and spiritual focus aligns with our action in the real world to truly reach our aim.

Page maker

There’s a lovely book called The Creative Entrepreneur which is designed for just that — to spur creative ideas from the visual stage to the manifesting piece. This begins when we move from thoughts and conversations about an idea to our personal role in manifesting the idea on the earthly plane through focus, strategy, and tasks.

Visual Journal styles vary. Photo: Abecedarian Gallery via Flickr.

What’s helpful about this particular book is that it leads the reader more and more deeply into the heart of their idea or aim.

While it’s pitched to “entrepreneurs,” and is definitely helpful in business, it’s not filled with a bunch of jargony or technical talk about businesses, making it applicable to ideas and visions of all sorts.

And really, it’s after your heart more than your brain as it attempts to nurture in the reader a sense of flow and focus that’s connected to your purpose.

In a sense, it poses a series of questions that help deepen your ability to visualize and articulate your ideas with clarity and precision. In particular it helps creative people who may struggle with more technical aspects of business by bringing the creative mind to those tasks.

But it’s fun!

It’s fun because you get to do sketches, make visual collages and answer questions about your ideas, your work style, and your self which, if dealt with consistently, can allow for significant growth of an idea from seed stage to project launch and beyond.

And you don’t have to think of yourself as a person with “artistic talent” to do the collages — it’s just for you. It’s self dialog, it’s self exploration, it’s play!

Visual journaling reflects your style. Photo: Abecedarian Gallery via Flickr.

But even if following such a book isn’t your personal development style, you can get a benefit from one of the book’s key tools: making collages, gathering photos, sketching, and picking out favorite items in the real world that reflect your vision — even if you just put these items up in an altar or on a bulletin board. The simple act of moving the internally visualized concept to an externally visible space can give you the boost you need to keep nurturing your vision.

Creating visual journals can also simply lead you closer to what you’re really trying to do, revealing new aspects of your self to your self all along the journey.

And the journey, after all, is the destination.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

By naesett on flickr.com

Wind, water and solar energy sources sometimes seem to hover out just beyond the horizon of cost-effective alternatives to fossil fuel. And even between proponents of the aforementioned sources there is often disagreement and sometimes contention. So where does an interested party, be that an individual or an institution turn to for accurate and helpful information and guidance? If you are such a party, you are in luck.  Just over the mountain, on the campus of James Madison University, sits the VCWE, or as I like to call it the Virginia Center for Wind Energy. According to its website it “provides wind related services to local governments, state agencies, landowners, academia, non-governmental organizations, and businesses. These services include wind resource measurements, economic modeling, education & outreach, energy policy analysis, assessment of technical specifications, Geographic Information Systems analysis, and the strategic deployment of wind power within the Commonwealth and beyond.”

My guest this morning is Remy Pangle, Director of Education and Outreach for the center.

Good morning and thank you for joining me on this lovely May Saturday.

After the show, I checked out KilowattOurs.org that Remy suggested. Here’s a great worksheet to get you started on saving on your energy consumption GOOD ENERGY STEWARDSHIP WORKSHEET.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

Wind turbines bring a breath of fresh air. Photo: Vaxomatic via Flickr.

It’s hard to believe that it’s been two years since the tragic Deepwater Horizon Gulf oil rig explosion, and a little over a year since the devastating Japan earthquake that left the Fukushima Nuclear Plant in ruins that still smolder dangerously today.

Though both of these accidents caused massive ecological damage, along with serious damage to people and livelihoods, it’s almost as though they didn’t happen. Such is the nature of our rapid pace media, with it’s eagerness to avoid the complex issues of modern industrial civilization.

Because of this, we tend to stay even more entrenched in the old energy paradigm instead of discussing alternatives.

But even without energy disasters that make short but dramatic news, there are plenty of other issues and obstacles to bringing clean energy on line in a way that’s affordable and accessible. Between costs and infrastructure concerns, business priorities, politics, and policy, it can be difficult to gain momentum on the drive toward more clean energy.

So, is there any good news on clean energy? Or any that’s big enough to make a difference?

The good news

While most clean energy projects don’t make huge headlines, there are so many innovative businesses and entrepreneurs, researchers and engineers, technicians and idea persons, organizations and supporters who, individually and together, are making huge strides in developing clean energy alternatives. More and more we’re seeing projects move from ideas to implementation in a way that provides real hope for a world in energy transition.

One project in our neck of the woods is the Virginia Wind for Schools initiative, which is part of a larger federal program with Wind for Schools programs in eleven states.

What’s so wonderful about this program is its focus on education at every stage, making it as much about the process as it is about an end product.

Because the program teaches about how wind energy can be used in rural communities to power some portion of a school’s energy needs, it has both an educational outreach facet — educating target communities — and an educational development component — with “the creation of a Wind Application Center at a university where wind energy education will be infused into the undergraduate and graduate curriculum,” according to the James Madison University Virginia Center for Wind Energy program literature.

In essence, as more wind resources and applications are developed, and the methods to finance and implement them are shared through the program, new and increasingly more creative solutions are brought to the table by the enthusiastic people running the programs.

Now, some of that information is crucial, but kind of wonky, such as how to work with local laws, secure grants, or deal with technical site planning issues in bringing clean wind energy infrastructure to a locality.

But much of is very accessible, and a real breath of fresh air.

Clean energy solutions

Kids, communities and even local decision makers get to learn about the possibility of generating a portion of their own clean energy when they work with the Virginia Wind for Schools program. And then when a project is developed, everyone gets the fun of seeing those elegant wind turbines turn and the meter start to reflect energy provided by a clean, renewable source.

Since wind turbines are very visible, the more projects that are created, the more the excitement around clean energy opportunities builds. One project, along with the outreach events that lead to the project’s completion, helps spawn another and another, which is just what’s needed to help move society along in leaving dirty energy behind and embracing clean sources instead.

This Saturday I’ll speak with Remy Luerssen of JMU and the Virginia Wind for Schools program to hear her take on how more clean energy projects can be developed here in Virginia, and what other benefits there are to undertaking these projects that we might not be aware of.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Envisioning a healed earth on May Day. Image: Alice Popkorn via Flickr.

It’s hard to resist the appeal of traditional May Day festivities. From the colorful May Pole Dances to the lore of  fertility traditions, May Day, with its roots in pre-Christian paganism, has the charming allure of something both accessible and forbidden.

If you really look into some of the ancient practices of May Day, or Beltane as it was called in some versions, this cross quarter holiday was pretty randy — unabashedly sexual in its celebration of a verdant spring giving way to a blooming summer. It was a day considered ripe with fertility, and perfect for couples to procreate in fields under the moon.

But like so many holidays and celebrations, May Day lost much of that potent and edgy spirit as it was co-opted into a more secular version, where symbols like the May Pole were given over to children’s dances, and gifts such as May Baskets of flowers replaced the wild dancing to bonfires that drove off the winter, or ritual acts of protection against mischievous otherworldly spirits.

Raising your spirits

There are some people today who believe that as the world faces a “great turning” brought on by global warming and other hazards of industrial materialism, that a revival of a connection to the spiritual world is being born, including celebrating Gaia and the Green Man, essentially the spirits and forces informing Earth and giving it its sacred character.

They also see each one of us is faced with an opportunity to integrate ourselves more wholly, to live in relation to a sustainable world, and to chose our livelihoods, our lifestyles and practices in accordance with what nature and humanity can harmoniously support.

Some in this movement call for reviving earth-centric spiritual practices. To them, the power of our minds to envision a healing of Earth at any time, but particularly in accordance with the long standing traditions of celebrations positioned at the seasonal markers — cross quarter days, equinoxes, solstices — adds to the potency as it reflects a connection to the living, integrated ecosystem both seen and unseen.

It’s undeniable that our world could use much healing both within humanity, and in the Earth we share with each other and all living things. To that end, whether one’s current tradition is part of those ancient pagan rites or of some other practice altogether, the appeal of May Day with its fertile undercurrents remains vital and urgent.

There’s room enough in the hearts and minds of humankind to take this moment on the turn of the sun to envision Earth as our Mother, deserving of our nurture and our care. Or to see the Green Man in the forest, a sprightly vegetative deity in his foliar mask as a living presence, animate and spiritually infused, Nature working with humans on an equal plane, rather than as our employee or possession.

We’re a part of the natural world, and it is a part of us, whether as deities, or as ecosystem, or both. May Day reminds us that natural forces reflect the eternal dance of the sexes, the rebirth of all.

In all its bloom and glory, spring’s garland of growth is a celebration worth remembering and worth holding in a sacred space.

– Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

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Barefoot Bucha is a small business that is deeply committed to sustainability. With our returnable bottles and local distribution, we maintain an extremely low carbon footprint.

Barefoot Bucha believes in good health, sustainable business practices, and our ability to positively impact the world through the choices we make every day. We think you’ll appreciate our efforts to bring you the best-tasting and most earth-friendly kombucha around.”

“When men in a Pennsylvania state prison join with victims of crime to create a mural about healing, their views on punishment, remorse, and forgiveness collide. Finding consensus is not easy – but as the participants move through the creative process, mistrust gives way to surprising moments of human contact and common purpose.

This complex story raises important questions about crime, justice and reconciliation–and dramatically illustrates how art can facilitate dialogue about difficult issues.”

(This show had been pre-empted in March and we were fortunate enough to be able to re-schedule it in May)

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

Pear tree. Photo: Rennett Stowe via Flickr.

Lawns are such a staple of the American landscape today that it may come as a surprise that such devotion to a mere patch of manicured grass isn’t something with deep historical roots.

Originally lawns were communal grazing plots of small villages, largely managed by the animals, who in turn transformed sunlight captured by grass into energy for transport, work in the fields, or meat and dairy.

Later, lawns became a decorative feature of the estates of the nobility, a sign of such copious wealth that the lord of the manor need not cultivate crops or plants there, but could instead enjoy a sea of perfect turf, ideal for walking or gazing upon.

Ultimately, as the rise in wealth of the industrial revolution allowed us each to have our own mini-manors, lawns trickled down to the common person, complete with a bed of otherwise unproductive grass that the owner tended to meticulously in an effort to “keep up the neighborhood.” Imitation of the nobility was thus complete.

Lawns can, of course, be beautiful.

But grassy lawns also require a lot of work and use a lot of resources (water, energy, chemicals) to provide little more than beauty. And, putting all of America’s lawns together, they’re one of the top sources of pollution and runoff in the form of chemical pesticides and herbicides. This damages topsoil and reduces fertility, imperiling future harvests while making our food and water toxic today.

At a time of fossil-fuel decline, environmental degradation, and global warming, the 2.2 billion gallons of oil used annually on American lawns for mere beautification and manicuring becomes wasteful and harmful in the extreme.

You are what you eat (or what you grow)

Fortunately, there’s an alternative, and it’s one that more and more people are taking up. It’s called edible landscaping, which is really the perfect storm of a solution in a world facing compound problems in economy, ecology, and energy.

There’s a wonderful new book, The Edible Front Yard: The Mow-Less, Grow-More Plan for a Beautiful, Bountiful Garden, that provides guidance on how to turn even the smallest home space into a food production zone. Whether you landscape with containers, or all over an expansive yard, using edible plants, berry bushes, fruit and nut trees, and seasonal vegetables, it can help get you started.

But if you’re like me, sometimes talking to someone about it is even better. That’s why I’m so glad to have Michael McConkey of the Afton, Virginia firm Edible Landscaping on the program this Saturday.

Michael is an old friend of mine and I couldn’t be more privileged to know someone of such an optimistic disposition who is so enthusiastic about living a life in balance with nature. It’s inspiring and impressive that Michael and his family have been promoting the edible landscape since the business opened it’s doors in 1979.

Edible Landscaping is an on-site nursery of edible plants of all sorts, and a mail order and web store. Michael’s rich wisdom and experience in cultivating plants, as well as how to make any outdoor space a food producer rather than exclusively ornamental, is the kind of advice and insight anyone who gardens — or who is curious about the movement toward more local foods — will want to hear.

He also plays a mean guitar (very nicely). Maybe he even sings for his supper. That has to be a great way to talk to all those plants.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Beginnings can bring difficulties, yet they are a time of great promise. Photo: Fabola via Flickr.

I once had a friend tell me that the first time she took a Qigong class she hated it with a passion. Though she liked other forms of meditative movement, and was excited to explore this ancient energy balancing regimen, she had an initial revulsion to Qigong that she couldn’t explain.

“But,” she said, a mere moment after feeling this aversion, she had the thought, “I think I’m going to be doing a lot of this, and will one day say ‘I love it.’”

She didn’t know why she had this sequence of feelings and thoughts, but in the end it turned out to be true. While she was turned off initially, she came to enjoy the slow movements, deep breathing, and focused attention of this energetic life practice with roots in Chinese medicine and philosophy.

New ventures

My friend’s story brings to mind the third hexagram in the I Ching.

Sometimes called Difficult Beginnings, the third hexagram, Chun, tells of the many complexities at work when something is new.

You might know the experience I’m speaking of when you’re undertaking a new project with enthusiasm and passion, believing things will just fall into shape through sheer force of excitement. Then when things don’t go as planned, or the unanticipated comes up, it feels like a setback.

Or it might remind you of starting a new job that you’re eager for, feeling it’s a good match and a great opportunity. You go in with ideas and hopes, only to find out that things at the new workplace are moving more slowly than you would liked given your readiness to take on the job.

Another way this might be felt is in trying to lose weight, get back into a fitness routine, or make a lifestyle shift toward more healthful habits of both body and mind. The force of what’s ingrained can act as a powerful counter force to what’s trying to be born, and that’s frustrating.

Using chaos, not fighting it

The R. L. Wing I Ching Workbook puts this poetically when it says of Difficult Beginnings that,

Just as the tumultuous chaos of a thunderstorm brings a nurturing rain that allows life to flourish, so too in human affairs times of advanced organization are preceded by times of disorder. Success comes to those who can weather this storm while maintaining their principles.

The book goes on to describe the many forces “struggling to take form” when change comes, or a new direction is sought. And it reminds us that it’s easiest at this time to get discouraged and to give up.

Third Hexagram of the I Ching.

It can feel like too much to be a pioneer with a new endeavor, or to change your life’s direction after growing accustomed to habits, relationships, and ways of approaching things. The power of entropy can be strong even if something within urges you toward change.

Yet it’s during those difficult beginnings that so much potent energy is present, even if it feels disorganized, chaotic, and overwhelming.

One foot in front of the other

One way to help bring order is to go Bird by Bird, as a particularly wonderful book on writing by Anne Lamott suggests. Don’t try to do it all–in her case, to identify every bird all at once. Instead name them bird by bird.

Slow down, breathe in, do one thing at a time. By way of encouragement, R.L. Wing writes that

It will take all of the energy and powers of concentration you possess just to organize the profusion of information coming your way.

Suggesting that remaining calm is crucial to the time of difficult beginnings, he adds that it’s important to seek advice.

Whether professional or just friendly advice is sought, the very act of taking difficulties elsewhere will help you sort things out successfully.

It’s important to reach out and rely on friends and family as you transition. These can be among the most stressful of times. But with a little support at those critical moments, you can transmute the shakiness of a difficult beginning — like the small and vulnerable shoot of a new plant — into the stability of vibrant growth founded on strong roots.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

A still from the film The Lost Boys of Sudan.

Is it possible for a meaningful bond to be created between people from different continents?  Between people who have lived entirely different lives?

In my final semester at James Madison University, in Harrisonburg, Virginia, my life has intersected with refugees from South Sudan, creating opportunities for connections and meaningful human bonds that have humbled and delighted me.

Life’s surprises

A simple click of menu options allowed me to add a random elective class to my schedule this year. And that changed my life. That click brought me and my classmates together with the Lost Boys of Sudan. In the process, we discovered a passion none of us ever expected.

We spent the first seven weeks of the semester studying genocide and refugee advocacy. We read numerous articles and heard story after story. It was a lot of powerful information and history — broad and personal — that was stunning to encounter.

After wading into that territory so deeply, we thought we were fully ready to meet with some of the survivors during a school trip to Phoenix.

We weren’t.

Getting personal

Meeting with Koor Garang and other Lost Boys of Sudan, hearing their stories in their words, in their own voices, right there with us, made us realized how unprepared we really were.

One night, we had all of the Lost Boys over for a cook out at the hostel where we were staying. I’ll cherish that night forever. We had great food, great company, and amazing conversations with each other for hours, lasting deep into the night.

At times I’d glance around the room at the different pockets of conversations happening and it seemed like I was living a dream. I was surrounded by inspiring men who have overcome so much adversity in their lives. Yet there they were, shining with optimism, open to new friends. They were some of the most genuine, humble people I’ve ever met.

Words to live by

Koor said something to us that night that still resonates deeply within my heart. He told us that we’re the ones in control of our lives; we have control of what we do every day. When we wake up each morning, our opportunities are there should we choose to take them.

I’m so excited that Koor and I will be able to share some of these experiences with the Real Life community this Saturday. It is also my hope that, if only in a small way, listeners can come to know this truly remarkable man and his inspiring story of adversity transformed into success.

 –Jami Limon, James Madison University Senior

Sometimes it's best to let the weeds grow around technology. Photo: Postiii via Flickr.

Some of you may recall my recent personal retreat, where I took three days to live and move and be in silence and separation from the outside world. While this was nourishing and renewing to me on so many levels, I can’t say that it was easy.

As a working woman, radio host, mother, daughter, sister, friend and volunteer, like most people living today, I’m plugged in and connected to my circle of work and personal relationships. And I treasure these connections, of course.

Yet like most people, I find it’s easy to get swept up into being “always on,” ready to respond to phone messages, texts, and social media updates; to get right back concerning a work matter no matter what time; to call that friend in need or just stop everything to chat, glad for a different kind of network distraction in a world of plugged in everything.

But is there a time when there’s too much of a good thing?

Overload

I love my family and friends. I love my work and volunteer activities. I love my hobbies and groups. I’m as caught up as anyone else in keeping all these things going, staying in the loop, and being prepared. It’s no wonder that when I crave or am drawn toward a personal retreat, I am both nourished and challenged by going inward to seek renewal: I need the break, but I don’t know how to let go.

Yet I’m beginning to think there is also some place in between being “always on” and the definitive seclusion of a private retreat. Some people call it a digital diet or an Internet diet or a technology diet. The premise is that, in doses (and provided it works for your career or relationships), it’s sometimes nice to just disconnect entirely and let that hyper-connected world go.

How did we get here?

After all, it was only about 15-20 years ago that cell phones came on to the scene. Back then, not everyone had one. Pagers were the domain of doctors and other first responders, or maybe a lawyer. Then parents who wanted to stay in touch with kids got on board.

Soon everyone had a cellphone. Now you can’t scan your eyes across a restaurant without seeing half the heads bent down, thumbs frantically texting, and fingers swiping a smart screen to change to a different view. We’re physically one place, while heads and hearts are another, somewhere off in screen time.

It makes one wonder how we ever lived without this stuff? It also makes one wonder if maybe living without all this stuff might not be so bad…at least sometimes!

Somehow several millennia passed with human beings not only effectively existing, but thriving, creating great works of literature, art, science, drama, medicine, food and you-name-it without the need to tweet it within seconds. In fact, maybe they created these things because they didn’t have an online world in which to retreat from the real meat of life.

In control of technology or controlled by it?

I’m not saying there’s anything inherently wrong with phones or the Web — they’re great tools that have helped amazing things happen and aided our being in touch with each other in important ways.

At the same time, if we can’t comfortably live without them for a few hours or a few days, isn’t it like the old saying that, “we don’t own our possessions, our possessions own us?”

None of us would call for human slavery to technology. But it looks like that sometimes. Maybe a little time away is just what’s needed to rebalance and encounter life in more holisitic terms. I know it’s that way for me (even though I get the irony of talking about this on a blog).

Now if you’ll excuse me for a moment, that little patch of sun and a nice cup of tea are calling…

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Local Dollars, Local Sense by Michael Shuman, Chelsea Green Publishing, 249pp.

In the recent book Local Dollars, Local Sense: How to Shift your Money From Wall Street to Main Street and Achieve Real Prosperity, author Michael Shuman explains the logic behind local investing as a source for regional wealth. He also calls local investment a buffer against riskier financial services, saying,

Given that level of uncertainty, smart money is beginning to look to the back roads for a living rate of return — and increasingly to local businesses. In a number of ways, Main Street investing is the opposite of Wall Street investing. While few of us ever get a glimpse of a Fortune 500 boardroom, local businesses are run by people we know and trust. Investments on Wall Street are short-term, increasingly held for mere seconds, while investments on Main Street are often held for many years. Unlike the markets on which Wall Street securities trade, which are abstract, distant and mysterious, the markets in which Main Street investors meet are typically concrete, personal, and transparent. The lure of a living rate of return, through local investing is increasingly powerful, not just because of the “push” from Wall Street’s risks, but also because of the “pull” from myriad local investments that could simultaneously do better than 5 percent per year and revitalize our communities.

Going local

Local has been the buzzword for the past few years, particularly with food, as communities have embraced the many benefits of local-focused living.

Walkability, supporting area growers, buying from mom and pop businesses, and generally taking pride and ownership in the creative genius of your own community is all the rage because it just feels right to support the people closest to us.

And going local has mattered as people have grown in consciousness about the devastating effects of industrial culture — from factory food production to the anonymity of big box stores to what it takes to ship all our “stuff” across the world in container ships.

All this has added up to a local shift that’s generating excitement and possibilities for communities everywhere.

Behind the curtain

But while the appeal of a farmers market, or a unique shopping district such as Charlottesville’s Downtown Mall are immediately apparent, what goes on behind the scenes to make such venues viable is a little less clear. Because our currency is still a national one, we don’t think as much about the role of money at the local level beyond spending some some of our own cash to support local businesses.

But how do those local businesses get started? Or grow?

Local banks, such as our own Virginia National Bank, think about — and act on — local investment all the time. They see and help make the connection between local ideas by entrepreneurs and the way to bring those ideas to reality. VNB —and banks like it in other areas — help fuel the kinds of investments that spur cultural and commercial expansion, job creation and even infrastructural developments in our own communities.

Most of all, by investing locally, VNB is one of the key anchors that allows what’s truly unique about our area to shine, even if their work is less immediately evident than the fantastic shop they gave a loan to, or the great winery they helped kickstart, or even those amazing organizations they help support as part of their local giving.

And as the key sponsor of the Real Life with Jennifer Till show, that last one is particularly important to the work we’re doing here at Real Life. We’re grateful for their support.

This Saturday I’ll talk with VNB’s Glenn Rust about hometown banking and just what a valuable role it provides for a community. He’ll help fill in the blanks on what local banking is all about, and why it’s so crucial to the strength of any community for investments to start local and stay local.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Wealth isn't just for the birds. It's for us, too. Photo: LadyoftheBirds via Flickr.

In a time like today when a lot of financial anxiety is in the air, as the economy limps along and yet prices for everything are rising, it’s nice to expand our notion of what constitutes wealth, riches, and abundance.

The rich world

During the past few days the weather has been slightly cool, but otherwise picture perfect. Gorgeously clear blue skies, perfectly puffy white clouds, and breezes cascading through the trees dappled by a lusciously bright sun.

Ahhhhh…Let’s just all breathe in, enjoy it, and breathe out. Because if you ask me, that picture of a perfect day is a picture of our riches.

So much of feeling abundance is a state of mind, of allowing even the simplest things — a single bloom in a small bud vase on your dining table — to reveal their riches to you.

A unique era

Some things we see visually, like the flower or a friend’s face, and we “get it” that we’re blessed with abundant riches. But some of it takes reflection — noting the amount and quality of our food, the warmth of our home, the comfort of our beds — and actively recognizing these luxuries (really, luxuries) as a kind of abundance unique to our times.

Historically (and even today across the globe) the average person hasn’t known abundance in such a flush and complete way as we do in this culture today. But many have still felt wealthy and blessed simply by seeing all things as part of their rich inheritance, wanting for nothing.

Abundance within

It’s a wonderfully enlightening exercise to reflect on your own life situation with a specific aim to see your abundance. Such an exercise can spur tears and laughter.

If you recall a friend or loved one who’s died, but who brought wisdom, joy or love to your life, instantly such an abundant gift becomes apparent, even as you’re sad that he or she is no longer there.

Or maybe you’ll do this exercise for a few days and suddenly you see everything through the lens of abundance. Toilets that flush? Abundance. Water that comes right out of the tap (and with good pressure!), abundance. A car that you just pop in, turn a key and drive 100 miles in a couple of hours — abundance.

And then there’s always the natural world. The moon. A star speckled sky. A bird’s call. Rolling hills. Laughter.

The world is abundance. We belong to it, and it belongs to us. It’s only a small step then from acknowledging such abundance to being grateful for it to tending it well. The abundance we receive is the abundance we give.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Brian Nunnery of in.gredients, a new zero waste grocery store. Photo: Patrick Lane Photography

One way of looking at the world is to see how many problems there are, with many of them seeming intractable.

Another way is to see any given problem as an opportunity to create solutions, including solutions that make the world a better place.

Sold on garbage

Ever since I heard about the zero waste* phenomenon, I’ve taken a personal interest in examining the garbage I generate. And I’ve tried to bring some consciousness to that garbage to see where and how I can make less of it.

It isn’t easy.

In so many ways the industrial world isn’t set up for less of anything, including trash!

When we add branding and advertising concerns, we find that most businesses making a product are thinking about using every inch of their packaging to re-sell us on buying their product again. Most business rank that much higher than producing less waste.

Sure, some packaging is recyclable, and that’s great. But of the classic three R’s — reduce, reuse, recycle — recycling, though more popular, is actually considered the least important to sustainability. It’s reducing and reusing that we really need to focus on.

In other words, our packaging use and trash accumulation is a really huge problem for industrial societies, leading to all kinds of issues with the acidity of the oceans, pollution of the land, strain on our waterways, the harvesting of trees, and the use of toxic petroleum in the production of plastics.

No trash talking

Fortunately there are people who see the whole consumption-packaging-waste-health-sustainability puzzle as a problem that can easily be an opportunity.

In particular, I’m talking about the geniuses behind in.gredients, an Austin, Texas based group of folks with the aim to create the first zero-waste and no packaging grocery store.

Clearly that’s a vision to create a better world in the process of solving a big problem.

In fact, I want to shop there, so I hope, as their website says, they’ll consider franchising their concept soon so we could maybe get one here in Charlottesville (though our local health and sustainability stores are wonderful, too.)

This Saturday I’ll talk with Christian Lane, co-founder of in.gredients, about the concept and logistics behind this store.

But more than that, we’ll discuss how a solution this simple can be so compelling for consumers while also creating a business opportunity, jobs, and prosperity for many in the surrounding community who will provide in.gredients with local farm goods.

What does an idea like this tell us about our world? Can we live in a way that is both delightful to the senses, prosperous for our communities, and yet makes a small footprint?

I bet I know the answer to that one. But I’m still excited to hear more about this vision and how soon in.gredients will be up and running. I hope you’ll tune in this Saturday.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

*Listen to my conversation about zero waste with Deborah Eden Tull, author of The Natural Kitchen: Your Guide to the Sustainable Food Revolution.

Say what you will about the Internet (it does have its dark and addictive features).

But it also has a tremendous capacity to move human hearts and minds in ways we can see — and likely in many ways that we can’t.

I was thinking about this when I started a picture board on the relatively new social sharing site Pinterest. My board is called Rumi Wisdom (I hope you’ll visit it and follow it here).

For me, on one hand, finding anything on Rumi is apt to inspire me, give me pause, move me to contemplation about ideas rich in complexity yet rendered with a beguiling simplicity.

Take this from Rumi,

Observe the wonders as they
occur around you. Don’t
claim them. Feel the artistry
moving through and be silent.

In an era like ours, the wonders are manifold. So many. Not only does the earth — in spite of many injuries to her beauty — remain steadfastly, awe-inspiringly gorgeous. But people, too, create wonders, share wonders, are wonderful in so many ways.

We neither claim these wonders, but nor do we not claim them, either. The question is, What does claiming them mean? Or how do we feel about the notion of claiming something — either as possession or, more positively, as inclusion?

Like so many words of the ancient wise, Rumi’s counsel against claiming is a reminder of non-attachment. As Rumi writes, it’s to feel, to encounter, to relate without the need to wear the thing, to boast of it, to cling to it or to hold it as a signal of one’s own worth or elevation.

The idea is to let all things move through us, to move with them, and to let them pass as the ephemera of existence, always changing, always moving.

To do any of the lower forms of claiming would be to descend to a kind of spiritual materialism, casting identification with an object, idea or path in an effort to “claim” some sort of special relationship to it and thereby “buy” the “worth” seen as within the thing.

On the other hand

At the same time, an ethos of sharing is filling our world today. In spite of the dominance of capitalism and the money economy, a new form of Sacred Economics* is being born, fueled by the gift economy, and the open, non-possessive sharing of ideas, images, inspirations.

Social Media, of course, has that sharing feature, even as it butts up against the residual hold of capitalism which seeks to turn everything to private profit and personal ownership, wanting to bar efforts to simply “share.”

Trying to keep these two realms — a money making realm with a monetary ethos, and an openly sharing realm driven by a non-possessing (non-claiming) ethos — distinct, is proving more and more difficult as the tensions between the two realms become more and more evident, causing a rift in our times. It’s a rift of mind, heart and lifestyle. And it’s not altogether unwelcome.

This rift may be most challenging when we encounter words of ancient wisdom and ask ourselves what this wisdom means for today? Can we compartmentalize wisdom, visiting it like a museum piece, finding no real living place for it in our actual world?

Or do we discover that living life in many separate boxes is a form of claiming that is claiming us, and not toward good ends.

When we openly share, in places like Facebook and Pinterest, (even if, like all things, they’re perfectly imperfect), are we “pro” claiming in a way that actually works for us, as we seek to heal that rift between realms that is clearly not serving humanity today.

The truth is, I don’t know. But I do wonder.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life Radio

* Listen to my March 2011 show with Charles Eisenstein, author of the books The Ascent of Humanity, and Sacred Economics, Money, Gift and Society in the Age of Transition.

Visitors to Michael McConkey’s nursery in Afton VA can certainly be forgiven if they find themselves thinking “wow, this looks good enough to eat!” It is.  For this is Edible Landscaping Nursery. And everything you see from flowers to bamboo trees is meant to be consumed. But once you navigate their website you set a sense that this is about more than just planting things you can eat. It is about our relationship with our bodies, with the earth that sustains us and with one another. Even if you are not a gardener, you are not going to want to miss a minute of the next hour.

Good morning Michael.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

A mural created in conjunction with Concrete, Steel & Paint.

No matter the context, forgiveness is not always easy to seek, or to extend.

Forgiveness challenges us to let go of an injury, understand something bigger than ourselves and our own feelings, and work toward the healing realm of reconciliation.

And if this is difficult in our personal lives, within intimate relationships, or in a family, imagine how much more difficult it is when forgiveness is sought from someone who has committed a crime against us or our loved ones? Imagine how much more difficult it is to bridge the divide when the other person is a stranger, barely even known to us.

We may imagine that our only role is to be glad they’re serving their time, that they were caught and that justice was served.  Any healing we may need we might not see as bound up in the radical act of forgiveness.

And the prison system makes it easy to stay that way.

The great divide

In the American criminal justice system, prison is far more about punishment, and far less about rehabilitation. Little emphasis is given to the context in which a crime was committed if that context means understanding the life of the criminal.

For many, this is how it should be. If a crime is committed, we don’t need to know (or care) if the criminal was once a victim himself. The only issue at play is what he or she did, and what sentence is deserved.

For others, context is everything.

These folks don’t excuse behavior, or ignore the crime. Like others, they call for clear punishment. But for them, even a violent criminal is, somewhere beyond the hard exterior, a human, possessed of all human qualities, and deserving of being treated humanely.

And this includes aspiring toward forgiveness.

In the recent documentary film, Concrete, Steel & Paint, these issues and more are covered with a profound sensitivity to the complexities at play for both the perpetrators and the victims of crimes whose aims are often very much at odds.

At least at first glance.

Healing through art

But with forgiveness at the heart of all major religions and many of today’s psychological therapies and healing modalities, treading into the unique terrain of witnessing each other — the violator and the violated — as fully human, as more than just the sum of their actions or perceptions, invites the sublime elements of human interaction to unfold.

This happens in Concrete, Steel & Paint through art, which is used as the conduit and bridge to overcoming initial resistance between prisoners and victims. Though it takes time, once it begins, the transformation is at once sacred and quite ordinary.

Watching such a process unfold inspires us to wonder about the mysterious powers of art, hailed throughout human history for their magic, ritual, and spiritual elements.

I’ll talk with filmmaker Cindy Burstein this Saturday about the process of making this film, and the compelling implications it suggests for all of us who seek reconciliation.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till Radio Show

What is hidden beyond the realm of the seen? Photo: Alebuddha via Flickr.

Last week researchers reported that a statue of the Buddha was discovered to contain ancient and sacred scrolls in its hollow innards. The scrolls were found, in part, through X-ray, cat scan and endoscopic technologies. And the discoveries were hailed in the press, with the Washington Post writing,

It was a surprising discovery, since Buddha is a Korean bodhisattva, or “bodhi” for short, and his caretakers are curators at the University of Florida’s Samuel P. Harn Museum of Art who, until then, had no idea the documents were inside the statue.

A common thread

But really, while using scans to learn more about religious statuary is helpful, it isn’t surprising that such texts were found. In fact, most statues of the Buddha aren’t considered “spiritually charged” if they lack a holy scripture inside.

As tradition has it, after a statue is carved or forged, a monk then blesses scrolls, prayers or sutras and inserts them into the hollow interior of the statue before sealing up the bottom. Often, religious persons or tourists shopping for Buddhist iconography in Asian countries will encounter shopkeepers who encourage the buyer to open the sealed statue before purchase to make sure such scrolls are inside, ensuring the spiritual viability of the icon.

In some ways what is hidden from sight is more important than even the beautiful statue to place on an altar. And to me, this also has a metaphorical application to our lives.

Seeing blind

We each wear our outward appearance as we live and move and interact with others. What’s seen are our (often) dazzling exteriors, our serene demeanors, or our humble, plain selves.

But what is concealed?

Who can know of the mysteries and depth within any one of us? Who can know how we’re spiritually charged by our devotion, our prayer life, our mindfulness, our journey into the terrain of our interiors or in seeking enlightenment in the wisdom traditions?

Yet we’re reminded by Buddhism — and by all the major religions and even secular humanist practices — of the value, worth and depth of every sentient being as well as all living things.

What conclusions do we draw in taking in those dazzling or mundane, beautiful or seemingly repulsive exteriors in our friends, acquaintances, or strangers? What do we really know of their histories, their journeys, or their spiritually charged centers? Of their joys, their suffering, their stories?

Looking more deeply

But there are moments that awaken us.

Even in a news item about how the wonders of technology meet the methods of art history, it seems the Buddha has a lesson to teach. In this recently discovered statue, a hidden Lotus Sutra rests, spurring us to seek something more, beyond the facts.

Remembering that each person we meet has inherent worth and merit isn’t easy in an age of degradation, commercialization, and multiply competing forces. It’s easy to be fooled into seeing people as mere slivers of themselves, or as pale shadows of humanity. We don’t like to think that of ourselves, that we treat others like that. But the pace of contemporary life often puts obstacles to honoring in our way, challenging us to live out our practice in all that we do.

Similarly, remembering the mystery and call within an ancient text is no more easy. As the Lotus Sutra discovered in this most recently revealed Buddhist statue relays:

This Sutra is hard to uphold,
If one upholds it for but an instant,
I will rejoice,
And so will all the Buddhas.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life Radio

Genocide, the deliberate and systematic destruction, in whole or in part, of an ethnic, racial, religious, or national group is, sadly not new. The Old Testament describes the genocides of Amalekites and Midianites. The Anasazi civilization in the American Southwest was destroyed in a genocide that took place around 800 AD. Genocides have occurred in the Americas, in Europe, in Australia, in Asia and in Africa. The historical frequency has done nothing to reduce the horror, the pain, the suffering, the loss experienced by those who. One of our guests this morning, Korr Garang is  a survivor of the genocide in Sudan.

We are also joined this morning by a young woman, Jami Limon, whose formative years were the polar opposite of Korr’s. Growing up in Maryland, with her emotional and physical needs well met by loving parents, she went on to college at JMU and with the click of mouse button made a choice that led her into the refugee world from which Korr had emerged. She says the experience has changed her life. In the spirit of full disclosure I also want you to know that Jami is one of our interns here at Real Life.

Good morning to both of you. Korr, if I may let me begin by reading a part of your biography…. Jennifer’s intro and description here …

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

tvtropes.org

In the 14^th century, wealthy business men in Italy would set up benches in the piazza, covered in green cloths called “banca”, to conduct financial business. From this humble beginning, banking as we know it today, got its start, and banks, have grown into complex, often international, institutions that offer what may be a confusing array of products, services and financial instruments.

Once seen as the Main Street backbone of American communities, banks today are now often lumped together with other institutions that have been the focus of the anger voiced by the Occupy movement.

My guest today, Glenn Rust, is president and CEO of Virginia National Bank, our major sponsor here at Real Life, and he has graciously accepted my invitation to join us to talk about what a community bank can and should be.

www.vnb.com

The Charlottesville Community Investment Collaborative can be found at http://www.cicville.org/…. Jennifer’s intro and description here …

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

in.gredients.com

Sometimes things just seem so perfectly suited that we wonder why it took so long before someone thought to put them together. The most recent example of this is the marriage between natural ingredients and zero waste packaging. Opening soon in the Austin Texas market is the nation’s first, package free grocery store. In the US alone we throw out over 500 million pounds of packaging a day. The founders of this revolutionary approach believe that they can set the standard of selling food that is good for the body in a manner that is good for the earth. Join me for what I’m sure is going to be a fascinating hour of conversation with my guest, Christian Lane.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

“When men in a Pennsylvania state prison join with victims of crime to create a mural about healing, their views on punishment, remorse, and forgiveness collide. Finding consensus is not easy – but as the participants move through the creative process, mistrust gives way to surprising moments of human contact and common purpose.

This complex story raises important questions about crime, justice and reconciliation–and dramatically illustrates how art can facilitate dialogue about difficult issues.”

www.concretefilm.org

(This show was pre-empted–look for it in the near future.)

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

www.clawcville.org

No armor, no weapons, no accoutrements of sport like bat or bow. Just two combatants locked hand in hand to test one another in strength and skill. Sylvester Stallone of Rocky fame even made a movie (Over The Top 1987) on the sport. And we in Charlottesville are no strangers to this crush gripping spectacle. But here, in the shadow of Monticello it is women who take the spotlight. I’m speaking of course, of CLAW, the Charlottesville Lady Arm Wrestlers, and this morning we’re joined by Jennifer Hoyt Tidwell and Laura Galgano whose organization is having a lot of fun and raising funds for women initiated projects.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

The constellation of a woman's body. Photo: VintagePrintable.com

I’ve said before that I look toward my own aging process with openness. After all, each year I do grow older, and, I hope, wiser. So it only seems natural to welcome each new age as a friend. I’m even planning an excursion to India with friends to embrace my fiftieth year with a sense of both joy and adventure.

But that doesn’t mean there aren’t challenges, too.

The unexpected

With aging, we naturally face changes.

Sometimes we grow more set in our ways, and sometimes we’re determined to do the opposite — trying everything we can to affirm life, in some cases feeling that these are our best years.

Sometimes we meet our wrinkles and graying hair with revulsion, imagining ourselves as less of who we are. Yet sometimes we see these physical markers as signs of an even deeper beauty, perhaps finding ourselves more pleasing than ever as we accept our flaws, forgive our faults, let go of the little stuff and grow in self love.

The most complex issue in aging for a woman may be moving with the array of internal changes prompted by perimenopause and menopause, as our bodies respond in myriad ways to hormonal fluctuations that we hadn’t felt before.

Interestingly some 30-40 symptoms are cited as related to the menopause arc, some of which can be quite disconcerting.

Dizziness and heart palpitations are frightening. Chronic insomnia can make the days exhausting and the nights interminable. Hot flashes can feel explosive and even embarrassing. And mood swings are no fun either.

I could go on. But suffice it to say that, while many women have felt that there is nothing that they can do, or, conversely, that it takes conventional hormone replacement therapy to cope, there are other answers.

New options

Today some doctors and caregivers advise us to approach health management as a whole— what you eat, how much exercise you get, and the necessity of rest and stress relief — while encouraging us to remain open to alternative approaches to menopause, such as bioidentical hormone replacement.

This Saturday I’ll be talking with Dr. Marina Johnson about what women experience in going through the different stages of menopause. We’ll also look at what we can do to transition more easily.

Cutting through a cluster of confusing information about the risks and benefits of different therapies, Dr. Johnson will also offer insight into bioidentical hormone replacement and the different ways this is administered.

If, like me, you want to take the gentlest, least invasive and least risky approach to your changing health needs, this is a show you’ll want to hear.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life Radio

A plant takes root in the yielding earth. Photo: USFS Region 5 via Flickr.

The coming of spring seems the perfect time to reflect on the essence of receptivity. The Earth, as an element, and in astrology, is often noted for its receptive qualities:  Yielding, giving, open, passive.

Giving way

The I Ching speaks of “the receptive” as giving, adaptive, evolving. In the R. L. Wing edition I’ve been referencing he says that nature “…is the responsive, yielding background for all events on earth.” He equates this to a “natural response.”

So what does he mean? What is a natural response?

My first inclination is to equate a natural response with something that is uncalculated, unpretentious, something…vulnerable and open. To take it to its extreme it might even mean to be unsure, though not necessarily incapable. In other words, the receptive state has no idea what might come, but it is able to respond to what does come.

A natural response is to let natural matters unfold, much like a seed germinating, taking root and sending out its new growth. This becomes a metaphor for human life and relationships.

So what does “being natural” tell us about ourselves? According to the I Ching,

By maintaining a pose of natural response even in the complex matters of business and politics, you can be assured that you are attuned to your own nature.

To me this suggests a deep significance to acting in accordance with our own selves, our own individual tendencies, whatever that might be. After all, as humans, each of us is unique. That begs the question, What is your own nature?

Each of us has a live to live, a story to tell, a journey to unfold. What might be my response to a situation or opportunity will be different for you. Each of us is presented with challenges, changes, options, paths. Which way will we choose?

There is no “right” or “wrong” if we are acting in accord with our own natures. But part of that receptivity is to truly be in tune with our own natures.

So how do we get there? Or maintain it once we do?

Truth is one, paths are many

We can’t dictate to another person what is their “truth.” But nor can we see all things as so equivocal that there is no common ground. The I Ching suggests an approach to answering this mystery:

Within your self spend time alone in objective thought as you consider the direction of your life. Meditate upon the idea that everything on earth, good and evil, is supported by nature. Strive to broaden your attitudes and opinions and view the world with an open mind. Objectivity will keep your natural response pure while it gives you great stamina of character and inner calm in dealing with the outside world.

This says to me that it’s important to not only consider my reactions to things, but a deeper place, a place of receptivity, where everything that comes at me, or that I act upon, is respected for its own nature as well.

K'un, the receptive, hexagram II in the I Ching.

Naturally such receptivity spawns a relational approach, a consideration of both self and other. Being receptive in such a dynamic suggests that while I am bringing my full faculties to the interaction, I approach all things with a respect, openness, and understanding that sees you (or another element — nature, animals, or processes) on your/their own terms.

It’s humility, gentleness, humanity, kindness, vulnerability.

I don’t know all the answers. But I do know that to be receptive, to move with a natural response, means to take in to consideration more than just my own wants and needs, whether real or perceived.

Maybe this is what is meant by the idea of “letting go.” It’s less about control, more about….surfing if you will. Riding the wave of life together.

But it may be about something more.

When receiving is giving and vice versa

After all, being receptive means “to receive,” to welcome or host. In the case of seeds planted in earth we know they get a cozy home in which to welcome rain and sun and so to grow and bloom.

If it were a child in the womb we’d say it is in that receptive place to mature toward birth.

In essence it’s the ultimate feminine principle to be yielding and receive in such a way that, through our very absorption of the energy brought toward us, we transmute it into its next incarnation.

Seen like this, truly, to “give” is to receive. And yet to receive is to give again. To give a nurturing place, to hold space, to let bloom with safety and security.

In this light, it appears that the natural response is flow. I’m receptive to that.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life Radio

mobilifarmtables.com

Bernadine’s genealogical interests surfaced briefly following Alex Haley’s “Roots” television series. This interest became ‘full bloom’ after her retirement.

It was important to her to learn about her family history because she wanted to pass it down to her adult children and grandchildren.

She started researching her mother’s maternal family, because she knew more about that side. That research led her to discover the Linwood Plantation in Louisiana upon which her maternal enslaved ancestors had worked.

In August 2009, Jeffrey Fracher, the descendant of the enslaver contacted her via e-mail after he saw a video about her research and the Plantation. In May 2010, Bernadine had the opportunity of meeting the descendant in Virginia. They met again April 2011 at Linwood where they took pictures, shared memories, and emotional healing. Their reconciliation has become a strong bond that has led to a friendship. They are going to meet again here in Charlottesville this weekend, and have graciously agreed to join us on Real Life to share their fascinating and compelling story.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

The miracle of life unfolding is all around us. Photo: Phil Roeder via Flickr.

It’s almost spring and a woman’s fancy turns to the outdoors, too.

I can’t help it. Nature’s voice rising above all at the moment and I have to heed her call.

I don’t know where you are but here in central Virginia bulbs are already bursting into glorious bloom, and those earliest, earliest buds on trees are ripening into a fuzzy spring-onion colored glow. All I can think about is the world of Mother Nature. Mostly I’m thinking about digging my hands in the newly supple soil.

Now, for serious farmers and homesteaders I know there’s lot of talk these days about the benefits of no till gardens and other methods that leave the soil intact so that the lowly (but generous) earth worm can do her important work.

But I like to dig. My last name is Till, after all, so I’m thinking I get an exemption.

Come on, get happy

And anyway, there also seems to be increasing proof that bacteria in the soil actually improves one’s mood. Maybe that’s why we like to dig. But we’ll give some credit to science, anyway. From now on when I catch myself in a grocery store mirror with dirt smeared across my face I’m simply going to think of it as “Happy therapy!” and wear it with pride.

But seriously, it doesn’t take science to convince me that gardening lifts my mood.

I can use my intuition alone, and connect easily with my heart, to know that being in nature, relating to plants and the natural world of sky and sun, breeze and scents is essential to my being.

From the most awe-inspiring natural formations — The Grand Canyon or The Himalayas — to the tiniest shoot popping up through the thawing winter ground, observing the amazing breadth of life on this earth is miraculous. And I don’t think that’s hyperbole, or cliche. Instead, it’s essential.

It’s easy to understand why for so long Earth has been called a paradise. I’m awed that we get to live here, with all this color and light. Or that we’re taken into the unexpected moods of the weather — sometimes brisk and chipper under a warm sun; sometimes brooding and dangerous in the surprise of a storm.

How lucky are we to dance on this earthly playground?

This bountiful place

Part of me wants to write today of my many concerns about how we treat the Earth, and even the politics of that. Or all the things we could do to buy less and reuse more in keeping with my Zero-Waste attempts.

But on a day when the sun is shining slant into my window, a cacophony of bird song trills on the breeze, and the sky is a shock of blue I wish I could capture and weave into a gossamer shawl, I just want to immerse myself in the natural world for the singular purpose of joy.

I simply want to observe and appreciate the natural world, to feel its love wash over me and appreciate this planetary home. I want to dig in the soil and catch the verdant scent of a new season asserting itself, being born from the last.

And I want to be a part of that unearthing of season upon season. To meet the natural world on its terms and receive its gifts. To meditate on all it implies. To find my place in the turning from inside to outside, from hibernation to blooming again.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life Radio

Of all the ways that women seek growth and self development in order to achieve a more balanced self, one of the most difficult is processing traumas. And of those traumas, none may be more pronounced — and therefore more difficult to heal — than sexual trauma.

Intimacy, which by it’s nature is much more private than many of our other life experiences, already has a tendency to isolate us. Historically, socially, culturally, our intimate lives are not generally a topic of open conversation. This is even more pronounced as we try to work through those elements of intimacy which may need healing before we can move on.

I say this not to add to the taboos and cultural norms that act to restrict dialog, but simply to acknowledge that, when such a cultural barrier exists, even when we want to be open, or are seeking to share or to find solace, there are many inhibiting factors conspiring against us.

While many resources exist for women —including our deep friendships — women still must feel comfortable and supported in seeking out help if they’re going to take the step to seek counsel or guidance. And that’s just not easy.

Healing sexual trauma

That’s why I’m both awed and honored to speak with Dr. Carolin Hauser, a Naturopathic doctor and Humanistic Psychotherapist about the role of early sexual trauma — a violation of intimacy — in inhibiting and even destroying relationships in the present and what you can do about it.

Ultimately what we’ll be exploring is how it is possible to heal from early trauma, to move past the devastating experiences and lingering scars of the past to unleash a healed and integrated self fully capable of enjoying and thriving in intimate relationships today.

Wounded healer

If you remember from my Tuesday blog, on Rumi’s call to welcome as a house guest all life’s events, no matter how grave or traumatic, you’ll have some sense of not only how difficult it can be to transform pain, but also how necessary and ultimately life changing such a process is.

Clinging to our traumas out of fear or deep sorrow and injury feels legitimate, and necessary. And yet if this acts as a force that puts road blocks up in the rest of your life, for years after the event, the power of the original injury will have grown a new life, one with the power to continually injure afresh.

But again, talking about this isn’t easy. Too many tender souls have had the indignity of not being believed or nurtured when they opened themselves up in vulnerability to share their stories.

Carolin and I will discuss the ways in which healing can happen, and hope can be reborn in any woman who’s suffered sexual traumas. I hope you will join us for this special conversation.

In peace–

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

The Rumi poem “The Guest House” offers an inspiring and yet challenging journey into acceptance of all of our experiences, no matter what.

Yes, no matter what.

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

A radical welcome

There are many, many occasions where such a radical form of welcoming might seem…more than anyone can muster. It takes a certain state of mind to reach what Rumi calls for here. That doesn’t make his words any less true, his advice any less enlightened, his admonition any less of a call to our higher selves.

But how do we do it?

If I look across the landscape of my life I see the the things that came easily and with much delight, and remember those that challenged me more than was comfortable, or made me feel that a real injustice had happened. When things felt really bleak or unfair it was admittedly more difficult to find the lessons or welcome “the dark thought, the shame, the malice,” with laughter. Over time maybe.

But even then it was sometimes too much.

Tell all the truth but tell it slant

Yet I feel the essential wisdom echoing across eternity in this poem. Seeing our lives as at once substantial and fleeting, and our experiences as worldly and yet of a higher spiritual essence, I see the threads of a deeper narrative of my life and spirit intertwining with others. And I feel the resonance that all things can be resolved through my engagement with them fully, nothing held back.

It’s then that I wonder with more openness if a “crowd of sorrows” can act upon me in such a way as to “clear me out for some new delight?”

I’ve felt that happen, and so know it’s truth. And I’ve seen it in others, too. I’ve seen enormous transformations when friends were dealing with cancer, or the loss of a loved one, or even a shocking change of job with all of the uncertainties that ensued.

The power of now

Perhaps it’s more from hindsight than within the throes of an encounter that such perspective can be achieved.

But might it be worth it to see if we can do the dance of immediacy, where we “welcome and entertain” all the guests right now without hesitation or conditions. Can we right now laugh with them and share our gratitude? Can we We differentiate fewer things into categories of good and bad, welcoming one but not the other, and instead find the love and friendship and gift in every event, encounter, journey.

Yes, I’d like to do that dance.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Drawing by Greg Kelly. Image: www.gregantrimkelly.com

Michael Kimmelman, chief art critic for the New York Times once said “A characteristic of good art is that it engages individuals in a very deep and personal way, and in ways that may not be shared by every member of a group. But art also can forge common bonds among groups.”

Through the ages art has inspired us, divided us, motivated us, perplexed us – all the while reaching out and touching us in ways that for some have been life altering.

My guest this morning, Greg Kelly, is founder of The Bridge, an organization here in Charlottesville that looks to bridge diverse communities through the arts. Join us this morning for a wide ranging conversation about the art community here in Charlottesville; the challenge to the arts in difficult economic times and the role that art can play in improving the quality of life in our community.

You can find Greg at www.thebridgepai.com and www.gregantrimkelly.com.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or  Listen Live!

Greg Kelly and the band of eccentrics who make up the Bridge Staff. Photo: The Bridge.

It’s often said that the life of the artist or writer is the loneliest one of all. In thrall to one’s muse and passionate about seeing a vision through from seed stage to finished piece, it’s often assumed that the artist must walk that path alone or not achieve the vision.

But art is also about community. It’s about what’s created, where it’s presented, and how it’s received. In the act of artistic presentation the artist is vulnerable, opening his or her work and even him or her self to being interpreted, evaluated, judged.

In the best of circumstances this is a dynamic and engaging process where the artist is held in the community space with an openness that allows the ranging terrain of the artistic mind to be honored for its courage and will.

It’s also about risk. The artist might meet with resistance while pushing the bounds of the familiar and introducing new ways of thinking about and experiencing life.

But no matter the edges and the unfamiliarity that art brings, it also has the capacity to nurture, heal, renew, to bridge divides rather than exacerbate them.

Bringing it all back home

So sometimes art is as much about creating community as it is about the creation of art.

Just as in many places, my home here in Charlottesville, Virginia has a vibrant art community that includes writers and poets, visual artists, musicians and performers, galleries, theaters and even spontaneous “happenings.” And like other communities, some of the emphasis is directly on how art engages, influences, nourishes and builds community.

A bridge to everywhere

My guest this Saturday, March 3, 2012, is Greg Antrim Kelly, Executive Director and Co-Founder of The Bridge Progressive Arts Initiatve in Charlottesville. Their mission is both to nourish artists and to build community. As their website says,

We strive to be a catalyst for positive change in our community, supporting the work of young and emerging artists while building community through the power of collaboration and direct engagement in the creative process.

With a raft of testimonials from the art world at large and from Charlottesville locals, it’s clear that The Bridge is meeting its mission while also treading new ground in integrating the work of the artist into what it means to be part of a social group, a community.

I’m especially moved by The Bridge’s Outreach Projects, which range from farm and food to music festivals and work with schools, to family as an art, storytelling and neighborhood revitalization. It’s inspiring to see art considered and acted on as a part of daily life, springing up in the in-between places of everyday experience. In this way art is both transformative in the power to move and engage us, and ordinary — simply a part of everything, all the time.

Similarly, The Bridge’s Special Projects, which generally take place outside of the  gallery environment, allow us to find ourselves amidst art in unexpected spaces — fields, portable galleries, a blank exterior building wall — pushing the boundaries of our compartmentalized lives into something at once more unknown and alive.

A potent approach

Approaching art with this intention arouses a particularly potent aspect of art: To enchant our world.

In a time when disenchantment is far too prevalent, and where the cynical domain of materialism and the profit motive seek to dominate human experience, this kind of re-enchantment is all the more welcome.

Join me this Saturday morning as I talk with Greg about his vision for art and artists and their role at the heart of the community experience.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Creativity is an act of engagement with self, world, and other. Photo: Eleanor Ryan via Flickr.

This marks the beginning of an occasional blog series I’ll be doing that draws from The I Ching Workbook, also known as the Book of Changes.

Like so many of the world’s ancient texts, this book offers wisdom whether you’re using it in oracle-like fashion to help divine more information for making a decision, or simply opening it up randomly and reading it for its poetic and philosophical perspective.

That’s what I’ll be doing as I add a blog entry here or there when the mood strikes. However, I’m going to be a bit conventional by going in order and writing on the topic of each hexagram in successive order. That means I’m beginning at the beginning, with Creative Power.

According to the R. L. Wing translation of the I Ching, Creative Power or The Creative is

…nothing less than the detonating device in the evolutionary bomb. The time is exceptional in terms of inspiration, energy, and will. It could be compared to the generative power of creation when the sperm enters and quickens the egg. The force of this time is the primal directive that propels us into our destinies in spite of what our reasoning or recalcitrant minds may think.

Wow! Sounds explosive. But is it always?

Unleashing creation

Though creativity clearly has it’s opposite — destruction —that’s not what we get from this passage. This passage is all about a stream of energy so undeniable to the force of nature and even human will that, in a sense, it catches one up in the self-propelling mood of it’s seminal spirit.

The first hexagram of the I Ching, Creative Power.

I think all of us can appreciate the spirit of creation and creativity whether it takes on life-changing dimensions or is more prosaic, say, in witnessing a flower bloom. I feel creative in situations as diverse as planning my radio show schedule, entering into the depths of a Sufi dance, traveling to a favorite destination, and even contemplating the wisdom of an ancient text.

For me it’s about being moved in some way, whether to act, or in mind. An experience might jolt or alter my consciousness. Or it might act more subtly, upon me, leading me to a new discovery of self, world, other. Creativity is one of those things that we can define and articulate, certainly. So I don’t want to say, “there are no words to describe it.” But creativity also has that feeling of being in the zone, of what the Chinese call “riding the tiger,” in a sense in a place that is beyond words.

In Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, writer Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi called this vibrant place of witnessing creation or experiencing creativity akin to “being in the flow,” balanced on the precipice “between boredom and anxiety.” In this place we’re engaged enough to find ourselves compelled, interested, unleashing our depths, but not pushing things so far that unhealthy stress (anxiety) develops, threatening the whole prospect.

And this flow can happen anywhere, in any situation.

Myriad permutations

I’m always very saddened when I hear my friends or other women talk about not being creative. Culturally we’ve been sent the message that unless we’ve created paintings the likes of Frida Kahlo, literature akin to Virginia Woolfe’s or otherwise stood out in our field for feats of greatness we don’t get to wear the mantle of creativity. But this misconception hurts women, and impoverishes us all.

Most creativity is found in small anonymous acts or happenings, events often witnessed quietly, alone. Planting an herb garden, writing a thank you note, watching a sunset while sipping a fragrant cup of tea. These all contain the profound nuances of creativity. And we all live this in our different ways.

Sure, the greatness of art, music and literature offer creativity of their own noble order. But that doesn’t mean they solely define creativity.

As the I Ching notes, creativity is a certain kind of focus. It is as innate to being human as is breathing or growing. We are all aspects of creation and we each contribute to the ongoing narrative that is our collective creation whether at the smallest levels — within our families and close relationships — or in our society and the world.

Each individual’s uniqueness is the song of creativity. What is yours?

–Jennifer Till, Real Life Radio

Woman meditating. Image: www.ashasart.com

In the 17th century the British Poet Richard Lovelace wrote:

Stone walls do not a prison make,

Nor iron bars a cage;

Minds innocent and quiet take

That for a hermitage;

If I have freedom in my love,

And in my soul am free,

Angels alone that soar above

Enjoy such liberty.

But prisons are made of concrete and bars and rules and limitations and are for most inmates a challenging world; even those with a deep desire to leave a different and a better person than the one that entered that incarceration. My guests this morning Asha Greer and Alison Montgomery, have spent the last eight years working with inmates at the Fluvanna Women’s Correctional Center helping them to discover a road to inner peace.

Contact Pat Coffey at patcoffey@aol.com for meditation volunteer opportunities at the prison.

You can purchase Asha Greer’s meditation cards, meditation book, and art at www.ashasart.com or reach her at ashagreer@earthlink.net.

You can reach Alison Montgomery at AFM2K@virginia.edu.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

Babemba tribe telling the accused about the good things that person has done in their lifetime. Photo: sfcookie.blogspot.com

“In the Babemba tribe of South Africa, when a person acts irresponsibly or unjustly, he is placed in the center of the village, alone and unfettered. All work ceases, and every man, woman, and child in the village gathers in a large circle around the accused individual. Then each person in the tribe speaks to the accused, one at a time, each recalling the good things the person in the center of the circle has done in his lifetime. Every incident, every experience that can be recalled with any detail and accuracy, is recounted. All his positive attributes, good deeds, strengths, and kindnesses are recited carefully and at length. This tribal ceremony often lasts for several days. At the end,the tribal circle is broken, a joyous celebration takes place, and the person is symbolically and literally welcomed back into the tribe.” ~Original source unknown

There is an essence of freedom that no prison can contain. Photo: Steve Snodgrass via Flickr.

“No matter where you go, there you are.”

This simple saying, often emblazoned on mugs or posters, and integrated into popular culture, is actually reputed to have its origins in Buddhism. It does have that sage ring about it, suggesting we can’t outrun ourselves, escape from our life, or be free of the things we still cling to.

Doing time

There may be no place where this is more true than in prison.

A sentence to incarceration confronts one, if not yet with the substance of their offense, or acceptance of their culpability, at least with the authority of those who ruled on the offense, those with the power to redirect your life into a very limited context, those who appear to control all aspects of your life and options.

Yet there you are when you’re in prison. And while walls and locks and rules may dictate the perimeters of its physical borders, that’s not all there is to the story.

Turning the saying on its head, that “no matter where you go, there you are,” it would be a mistake to imagine that an actual, literal prison has the power to chain the human spirit, to tie down the human mind, to put up obstacles to the infinite.

Not if we don’t let it.

Whether that prison is part of a punishment system, or a prison of our own making, there remains an essential place where we are free.

Invitation to surprise

A couple of years ago I was asked to be a part of an amazing outreach effort called the Blue Ridge Prison Project. Begun by the Fluvanna Correctional Center for Women in conjuction with the Insight Meditation Community of Charlottesville, the aim was to bring gentle meditation, a healing space of body, mind and heart, to incarcerated women.

What a gift that invitation was.

People often remark that when asked to share their blessings and gifts with others, it is they who actually receive the most. That’s definitely been my experience.

A year ago, when I was finally “cleared” to teach meditation at the prison —I sometimes joke that I’ve been trying to break into prison for two years — I stepped over the threshold into an experience unlike any I have ever had.

Compassion, empathy, respect, honoring others, gentleness; these things have always mattered to me, and not abstractly. I’ve tried and try to live them every day, seeking to tend with care all beings in my sphere and to be open to finding reciprocity for this in the universe of my encounters.

But it is in seeing and encountering individuals in trying circumstances, where the window for helping or just being present for them is by its nature limited, that such efforts to connect and hold space for others takes form in a deeper way.

I’ll be your mirror

I’ve felt that greater depth in teaching meditation to these beautiful, women inmates. The meditation time is precious, because it’s short. The encounter is sacred for confronting me with my limitations in the situation. There is a natural and organic unmasking that takes place. Pretenses are gone. There is just the moment, and making it count.

Yes, I have something to give which makes me feel rich in the giving. And yet I feel weak, helpless, uncertain, too. Can I really help? Can I be my best self? Can I give unconditional compassion? The inmates and I, we mirror each other’s vulnerabilities.

Mistakes don’t matter in this moment. The past has no hold. We can be our best.

Quiet, silence, breath, safety, and trust are gifts we share with one another in the meditation time. Conversations ensue, and vulnerabilities grow even as they are lessened through the sharing.

In getting to know these women, I feel moments of, “There but for the grace of God go I.” The stories of the women I am privileged to encounter are stories of woundings and recovery, of fear and of heroism. Of losses and lessons. And of hope.

That they come to the meditation at all is a testament to the spirit of life, to the will to something more, to the opening to a redemption that no one can give nor any deny, even to a prisoner.

There is a place a freedom. There is a place of light. We meet in that space.

Join me and my guests Asha Greer and Alison Montgomery this Saturday for Peace in Prison as we discuss the opportunities and gifts found in being facilitators in the Blue Ridge Prison Project.

–Jennifer Till, Real Life with Jennifer Till

Kerry this is such a serious topic that I want to take a moment before we start to let our listeners know of your credentials. You hold a degree as a LCSW, are a graduate of Stanford University and Smith College’s School for Social Work, You have offered consultation to trauma therapists both nationally and internationally in countries such as Nepal and the Republic of Georgia and learned about war-related trauma first hand while living in the Middle East during the Lebanon War.  Prior to establishing your current private practice in Charlottesville, you ran the Center for Child Protection at Children’s Hospital in Oakland California and worked with severely traumatized children and their families at the Kennedy Krieger Institute in Baltimore, MD.

Here’s where you can register for Kerry’s class Understanding Self–A User’s Guide, www.scps.virginia.edu/applying-registering.

… Jennifer’s intro and description here …

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

Aboriginal dreamtime Photo: crystalinks.com

Regular listeners to Real Life know how much we love musicians..and story tellers. So when we find a talented individual who is both, well the attraction is irresistible. Jim Gagnon is yet another of the extraordinary artists who live in the Charlottesville area. In addition to being on staff at Jim Donovan’s Rhythm Renewal, he is also currently Artist in Residence in the Albemarle County School System, and he has graciously joined us this morning to share with us some of his insights and stories from his worldwide travels as both performer and educator….

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

It is 1968, the height of the Vietnam War. A young man, just turned 19, arrives in Bangkok to the country where he was born and adopted as an infant. This is the opening of the novel Indra’s Net written by Brad Bryant who lives and works here in the Charlottesville area. It has been described as an adventure novel with a metaphysical twist. Those of you familiar with Buddhism will undoubtedly recognize the title as a symbol of the interconnectedness of all things. In the words of one of my producer’s favorite philosophers, Alan Watts, “Imagine a multidimensional spider’s web in the early morning covered with dew drops. And every dew drop contains the reflection of all the other dew drops. And, in each reflected dew drop, the reflections of all the other dew drops in that reflection. And so ad infinitum. That is the Buddhist conception of the universe in an image.”

This morning I have the pleasure of talking with the author about his work, his time living in Thailand and hopefully learn more about his own metaphysical journey…

Here’s the book that Brad talked about – The New Physics and Cosmology Dialogues with the Dalai Lama, Arthur Zajonc, Editor.

You can find Brad’s book at www.heartwoodpublishing.info.

Call in Saturdays 8:00am – 9:00am in Charlottesville on WINA 1070 AM 434-977-1070 or Listen Live!

If 2012 marks the end of Dave Norris’ two terms as Charlottesville mayor, it does no such thing when it comes to his involvement in the life and well being of this community.  Long an advocate of affordable housing, environmental sustainability and educational opportunities for young and old, he will continue his efforts both as a member of City Council and with the newly formed The Charlottesville Institute for University-Community Engagement.  Join with me this morning as we look back at some of the highlights of his six years on council and look forward to his vision of the future for our city.

You know, I forgot to thank him for his service to in our community…thank you Dave Norris.

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Suppose you had a burning desire; a calling; a certainty that you wanted to help create a better, more sustainable planet? How would you go about making that vision a reality? If you were Deborah Eden Tull, you would write a guidebook on living the interconnected life; start a blog and develop online courses and workshops to share your knowledge with those interested in healthier and more effective personal lives.

And of course you would launch an online fundraising effort to raise the $10,000 necessary to get everything rolling.

Join me this morning for an engaging conversation with a woman who wants no less than to change our world.

www.deborahedentull.com

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Our country spends over $10 billion (with a B) dollars a year in the pursuit of hope—the hope that somehow I can make myself “better.” Why is this such a successful industry?

www.onehouseofpeace.org

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Real Life with Jennifer Till is Charlottesville’s fresh new radio show for women who are REALLY ready to love their life. Join us to share a piece of your story and uncover possibilities yet to be explored. Hear how other women face their challenges, reframe their failures and celebrate their success – stories and lessons learned to help you find balance, alignment and joy in all of the areas of your life.

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Original air date 12/11/2010

A new impact driver for Dad, some French perfume for Mom, an Ipod Nano for Jessica…sound familiar? It’s Christmas time and so we make lists, presents to buy for the people we love. It’s not a tradition that’s going to end any time soon. Nor would I be the one to suggest that it should.

But in the midst of our annual glut of consumerism, is there an opportunity to reframe how we think of giving and how we choose our gifts? Can we be kind to those we love AND at the same time be thoughtful and generous to others and the one planet that we all share?

I invite you to listen as we explore Christmas with a different perspective as we ask, “What Would Jesus Buy?” with my friends and guests, Savitri D. and Reverend Billy, with The Church of Life After Shopping.

www.revbilly.com

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http://tinyurl.com/82cjhex

No matter how much we love traditions, and we do, there’s always a time to start new ones. And with more and more of us looking to share the resources of our planet, there may be no better time than now to look at starting some Holiday traditions that spread the joy but reduce the ecological waste. This morning my guest, Deborah Eden Tull, author of The Natural Kitchen: Your Guide to the Sustainable Food Revolution, and I will explore the brave new world of Sustainable Holidays.

www.creativegreen.net

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Today my good friend, Caverly Morgan, Founder and Director of One House of Peace, and I are going to talk about gratitude. Caverly was a zen monk for 8 years prior to founding One House Peace.

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But don’t let the informality fool you. When we sit down there is usually a topic that’s front and center in our collective intelligence. What some of you may not know is that David and I also collaborate on work projects in the area of organizational development. We’ve just recently completed some work that deals with the need for cultural change and the recognition of how hard change can be. We’ve spent many hours thinking, reading, researching, discussing and yes, even arguing about change and it felt like the most natural thing in the world to invite you, our listeners, into this conversation.

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Andrew Forsthoefel  explains the motivation for this walk: “I think…it’s such a gift to be truly heard and fully seen by another, for it’s in being heard and seen that our story is recognized as a great one, and that all its chapters of tragedy and triumph are the components of some ineffable but undeniable miracle, every bit of it beautiful, every bit of it us. To forget someone’s extraordinariness seems heartbreaking. And to put stock in a celebrity instead of my neighbor, a sitcom instead of myself? Disaster.”

www.WalkingToListen.com

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So stay tuned for what I expect will be a far-reaching and far-ranging conversation about the state of our planet, the state of our community, what’s its like to be a 21st century witch, about the Occupy movement, about her efforts to turn her groundbreaking book, “The Fifth Sacred Thing,” into a movie on her terms and whatever else pops up along the way.

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Good morning Ivana and thanks for being here so early on a Saturday morning.

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This morning we are joined by a former guest, Susan McCulley, who many of you may remember is a NIA Blackbelt at ACAC and we’re going to talk about balance, not on any grand conceptual level, but on a very real and every day basis of our bodies, and how achieving that level of balance can help us on every level of the journey each of us is on.

Good morning Susan.

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This morning we are going to focus on a much smaller number–the number one. The one person in the life of the cancer patient: husband, mother, daughter, brother, who is there in the role of primary support or caregiver. We will look at the trauma from their point-of-view and the way in which that relationship can alter how we look at life itself.

My guest this morning, James Yates, has been with us before in the role as a psychotherapist talking about relationships. This morning he has graciously agreed to share his insights and the lessons he has learned during his wife’s battle with cancer.

Good morning James.

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My guests today Bev Wann and Sue Rainey raise money here in Charlottesville to support the African Development Project; a coalition of five African charities whose goal is to support individuals in a way that helps create a path out of poverty and despair. They look to create sustainable solutions, for the land and the people it supports.

Good morning ladies.

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I know of no one who is against peace. No one. But I also know that in the last 20 years alone we have had over 100 wars and outbreaks of violence around the world. So the question feels like it needs to be asked. How does the support of, and the participation in, such events make a meaningful difference in our world?

I am joined this morning by Ron Povich, radio personality and organizer of an event here in Charlottesville, to learn more about how this day and this organization hopes to make such a difference.

Good morning Ron.

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Since its inception, Peace Day has marked our personal and planetary progress toward peace. It has grown to include millions of people in all parts of the world, and each year events are organized to commemorate and celebrate this day. Events range in scale from private gatherings to public concerts and forums where hundreds of thousands of people participate.

Anyone, anywhere can celebrate Peace Day. It can be as simple as lighting a candle at noon, or just sitting in silent meditation. Or it can involve getting your co-workers, organization, community or government engaged in a large event. The impact if millions of people in all parts of the world, coming together for one day of peace, is immense.

International Day of Peace is also a Day of Ceasefire – personal or political. Take this opportunity to make peace in your own relationships as well as impact the larger conflicts of our time. Imagine what a whole Day of Ceasefire would mean to humankind.
(Excerpted from www.internationaldayofpeace.org)

What will you do? You can start by listening Saturday morning as my guest, Ron Povich, and I discuss personal and global cease fires and one event, of thousands around the world, that will be happening here in Charlottesville.

Peace and Justice. Peace Corps. Peace Frogs. Peace Lily. Peace and Love. Peace Dove. Peace Out.

I used to think that finding Peace was like pulling a big warm and cozy blanket up and over and snuggling in underneath. In my made-up world, the Peace blanket that covered me made everything underneath safe and perfect, keeping in the good, keeping out the bad. But it wasn’t true. No matter how much I wanted it to be, it just wasn’t so. Broken heartedness, shame and unworthiness were hiding underneath my blanket and kept poking out the sides, staining its imagined perfection. The Peace blanket didn’t really take all this “bad stuff” away–I simply pretended it didn’t exist.

It took a shattering event in my life to realize that there is a gap between the ideal state of Peace, and the human experience of becoming Peace. I’ve learned that cultivating Peace is an ongoing process, and I’m required to wrestle with the places in myself that I’m ashamed of. Or scared of. Or loathe. And in this wrestling, I come face to face with the person that I’m not “supposed” to be. Sloppy. Lazy. Liar. Selfish.

I think we all exist on the continuum of any particular human trait; that it is rare to find something or someone that is frozen for all time at a single point. I want to think of myself as good, but have to recognize that my behaviors and my actions move from one end of the scale to the other. So the con-man has lied to get money from his latest scam. When have I lied to get what I want? So the student has stolen an Ipod. When have I taken something, that wasn’t mine, perhaps just figuratively, but stolen it none the less?

Today, I surrender to becoming more and more of a whole human being, calling a detente between the antagonism of what I’ve been enculturated to believe is not acceptable, and the feelings, desires, and needs that I actually experience. Willingness is key. Rather than pushing away discomfort, I lean into it and ask, “What can I learn about myself?” I strive to continue to push against the walls of my “container” to increase my capacity to hold seeming contradictions simultaneously. To welcome the conflicted parts of myself. To extend compassionate kindness even to the most unforgiveable parts of myself. And in doing so, I continue my journey toward reaching Peace.

Namaste.

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There are people that perform random acts of kindness and charity every day. For many of them, it is part of their belief in the power of a simple philosophy called Pay it Forward, from the book and movie of the same name. A daughter receives a kidney from a stranger, and her mother donates her own kidney to another stranger, forming links in a chain that stretch out months or even years.

When I asked listeners, “What kind things have you done?” I heard, “Weeding a neighbor’s garden while they’re on vacation”, “anonymously sharing home-baked cookies”, “paying the toll for the person behind”…Catherine Ryan Hyde told me of a “Pay It Forward” chain that lasted all day at a drive-thru restaurant.

What drives us to do kind things for people we don’t know, without even the pay-off of our “goodness” being affirmed by the recipient? Is there something other than the “pat on the back” or the “attaboy” that motivates us to do good. I wonder if people somehow feel connectedness at the core of their being. The Dalai Lama says that kindness is his religion. Mine too!

Join me as we both find out about Catherine Ryan Hyde’s experience of writing her book, “Pay It Forward,” and it being made into not only a movie but a foundation.

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I want to start out with a quote from the back cover of your book:
“As you read through this amazing book, a realization dawns. The medicine needed for true sustainability, true balance, turns out to be our own passion for what we love to do, combined with our longing to be home.”

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“Why would I do that?” asked the woman.

“You know, to reduce consumerism in your life. To break the chain of having more and more and then needing bigger and bigger spaces to store it. To live a simpler and less complex life.”

And the woman replied, “Why would I do THAT?!?”

My guest this morning, Tammy Stroebel, Blogger and activist with an engaging website called Rowdy Kittens: social change through simple living, is going to help us answer that age old question of WHY? Good morning Tammy. You’ve taken the 100 Things challenge, haven’t you?

www.rowdykittens.com

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Good morning Beryl.

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But if your goal is to the be the best parent you can, help raise children who are secure, confident and capable, and who have positive role models of cooperation and collaboration –parenting with your ex is a skill you’re going to want to develop.
Please join me in welcoming my guest this morning, Ellen Kellner, Coach, Speaker and Author of The Pro-Child Way: Parenting with an Ex.

Good morning Ellen.

www.theprochildway.com

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azione-scopo.com

If you wish people to obey you, you must learn to obey yourself; if you wish people to believe you, you must learn to believe yourself; if you wish people to respect you, you must learn to respect yourself; if you wish people to trust you, you must learn to trust yourself. ~ Hazrat Inayat Khan

Good morning Chef Kellie.

www.mandalameals.com

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Real Life with Jennifer Till is Charlottesville’s fresh new radio show for women who are REALLY ready to love their life. Join us to share a piece of your story and uncover possibilities yet to be explored. Hear how other women face their challenges, reframe their failures and celebrate their success – stories and lessons learned to help you find balance, alignment and joy in all of the areas of your life.

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danwilsonmusic.com

So please join me for some conversation, some insights and some live and beautiful music.

You can contact Margaret Newcomb at mn2k@yahoo.com. If you would like to contribute to Chelsea’s flute fundraiser, you can reach her at cmeynig09@su.edu.

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Mrs. Hackman also holds the position of solving one of life’s unsolvable mysteries. She taught me THE best cure for hiccups. She held the water fountain in the on position while I plugged my ears and drank. Worked like a charm every time…

Four over four decades the person that she was has had a profound influence on the person I strive to be. And I am grateful to have known her.

“Wow,” you think, “such a sublime experience of my own existence.” But when yoga is over you forget it. Few people are hyper-conscious of their breathing all the time.

Energy is much the same. It fuels everything we do in the modern world. And in petroleum, it also acts as a raw material in plastics, medical supplies and other products. It’s everywhere. It’s unequivocally the thing before the thing. As in before the hospital, before the school, before the fire department. As in before the education system, before the health care policy, before the first responder funding. Like breathing you become aware of energy for a moment and then…back to snoozing on it.”

But for many of us energy problems feel really big; large corporation big; environmental group big; country big. What can we as women, as individuals do, besides making ourselves more aware of the issues, to make a difference? This is one of the questions we will be exploring this morning with my guest Lindsay Curren, Founder of Lindsay’s List.

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When we communicate we have the power to inspire, to inform, to captivate and, all too often, to hurt: to hurt others or to hurt ourselves. In the past decades, we have learned that violence is not confined to physical actions but can also be a part of how we communicate.

The really good news is that each of us can learn how to communicate in non violent, compassionate and effective ways that can improve our personal relationships and, by extension, the world around us. This morning, my guest, Sea Aviar, an NVC practitioner, and I are going to explore Non Violent Communication or NVC.

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• Waiting for governments to fix the problem is not the solution
• Acting as individuals, the effort is not substantial enough to make a difference
• Working as communities offers the best opportunity for success.

Joining me today to talk about peak oil, explore what Transition Town means to you and how our local community can prepare for a future that will be cleaner, more local, and run on a human-scale are Lindsay and Erik Curren, co-founders of TransitionVoice.com

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Rose, Good Morning.

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Discomfort. Ughh. I find that with the wisdom and the white hair installing itself at my temples, comes the growing desire for ease and comfort. It’s no wonder that the feelings that came up for me when I was talking with Rose Brown on air this morning caused not only my palms, but my feet to sweat!

Zero Garbage Challenge. Really? Zero? I found myself wanting to re-negotiate the level of challenge. How about The Almost Zero Garbage Challenge? Or the Less Than I Used to Produce Garbage Challenge? I find myself in this awkward yet undeniable position of having to weigh my concern for our Mother Earth and our yet unborn children against my willingness to stretch out of my comfort zone.

As Rose suggested, I will work with re-framing my perspective from should to could. What opportunities lie within the resistance? Shedding the light of awareness on my actual consumption habits I’m sure will be illuminating. This weekend, I’m going to set up a system to segregate my the trash for a month to see what I’m actually throwing away. Then I’ll see what feels like the next right step for me.

I’m pretty sure that I’m not going to give up using tampons…I’ll let you know how things unfold…

So why do we, as a community, as a gender struggle so with these issues and what can we do about them.

My guest this morning has her thoughts on the subject and is here to share them with us. Sheila Early (also known as Ahmadi) is a Charlottesville based Licensed Clinical Social Worker at UVA with over 25 years of experience if working with high risk teens and women and has done so with the goal of helping those women “experience themselves differently” and in so doing lead healthier and more satisfying lives.
Good morning Ahmadi.

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This morning we hope to explore the truths and myths about ASD and about the unique challenges it places on caregivers, friends, teachers; just about everyone who touches the life of a child born with ASD.

My guests this morning are: Ethan Long, the Executive Director at Virginia Institute of Autism, and Bernie Webb, father of a family affected by autism. Susan Anderson, a developmental pediatrician at UVA, will join us for the last segment of the show.

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I am joined this morning, in the studio by PMH Atwater, researcher, spiritualist, author, public speaker, prayer chaplain and visionary, who, as the title of one of her books says “died three times in 1977”. According to her biography on Wikipedia she “is a pioneer in subjects like near-death experiences, the aftereffects of spiritual experiences, transformations of consciousness, reality shifts and future memory.”

And joining us by phone is Dr. Eben Alexander, an academic neurosurgeon for the last 25 years, including 15 years at Harvard Medical School, and currently serving at UVA. In 2008 he was overcome by bacterial meningitis, rendered comatose on a ventilator in the ICU, a state in which he persisted for the next seven days. In his words he says. “My story offers a critical key to the understanding of spirituality. The human part of my brain, the neocortex, died for a week. In the midst of that, I had an extraordinary experience that could not have occurred in my brain, given our current understanding of neuroscience.”

Welcome to both of you.

http://www.pmhatwater.com

http://www.reconciliationlife.com/

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Care is There: www.careisthere.com
Cville Seniors: www.cvilleseniors.org
Aging in Place Business Round Table: http://www.cvilleseniors.org/profile/AginginPlaceBusinessRndTble
Exuberances photography show: http://tiny.cc/exuberances

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According to its web site, Doorway Into Light is founded on the essential truth that the death of our bodies is a sacred and spiritual passage. We are dedicated to elevating the process of death and dying back into the realm of sacred work; empowering, educating and supporting families and communities on their rights and choices for the dying; and helping to heal this culture’s relationship to aging, dying and death.

http://www.doorwayintolight.org

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http://www.ascentofhumanity.com/

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In that first
hardly noticed
moment
to which you wake,
coming back
to this life
from the other
more secret,
moveable
and frighteningly
honest
world
where everything
began,
there is a small
opening
into the new day
which closes
the moment
you begin
your plans.

What you can plan
is too small
for you to live.

What you can live
wholeheartedly
will make plans
enough
for the vitality
hidden in your sleep.

To be human
is to become visible
while carrying
what is hidden
as a gift to others.

To remember
the other world
in this world
is to live in your
true inheritance.

You are not
a troubled guest
on this earth,
you are not
an accident
amidst other accidents
you were invited
from another and greater
night
than the one
from which
you have just emerged.

Now, looking through
the slanting light
of the morning
window toward
the mountain
presence
of everything
that can be,
what urgency
calls you to your
one love?  What shape
waits in the seed
of you to grow
and spread
its branches
against a future sky?

Is it waiting
in the fertile sea?
In the trees
beyond the house?
In the life
you can imagine
for yourself?
In the open
and lovely
white page
on the waiting desk?

~ David Whyte ~

(The House of Belonging)

http://www.healthsystem.virginia.edu/internet/volunteer/auxiliary.cfm

http://www.wix.com/uvaauxiliaryauction/silent

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My guest this morning is Kate White of  Birth Matters, VA and a driving  force behind trying to change that. According to their web site: “The Healthy Birth, Healthy Baby event is a first time collaborative event between public, private and nonprofit agencies and providers who support pregnancy, birth and the postpartum families.” Briana Tillman is also joining us to share her birth story.

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One of America’s leading spiritual teachers and authors, Sharon Salzberg is the co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society (IMS) in Barre, Massachusetts. She has played a crucial role in bringing Asian meditation practices to the West. The ancient Buddhist practices of vipassana (mindfulness) and metta (lovingkindness) are the foundations of her work.

Sharon is a regular contributor to the Huffington Post, and was a contributing editor of Oprah’s O Magazine for several years. She has appeared in numerous magazines including Time Magazine, Yoga Journal, msnbc.com, Self, Tricycle, Real Simple, Good Housekeeping, Body & Soul, Mirabella, Buddhadharma, More and Shambhala Sun, as well as on a variety of radio programs. Sharon has also served beside the Dalai Lama on panel discussions.

Good morning Sharon. Would you lead us in a breath practice this morning?

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Good morning Elaine. I first found you through a blog that you had written entitled Breaking up with Feminism. For listeners who have not yet read it, could you give us a quick synopsis?

http://www.startribune.com/opinion/commentary/111695344.html

Here is the poem in full from which Elaine read an excerpt:

Awakening Now

Why wait for your awakening?
The moment your eyes are open, seize the day.
Would you hold back when the Beloved beckons?
Would you deliver your litany of sins
like a child’s collection of sea shells, prized and labeled?
“No, I can’t step across the threshold,” you say, eyes downcast.
“I’m not worthy, I’m afraid, and my motives aren’t pure.
I’m not perfect, and surely I haven’t practiced nearly enough.
My meditation isn’t deep, and my prayers are sometimes insincere.
I still chew my fingernails, and the refrigerator isn’t clean.”
Do you value your reasons for staying small
more than the light shining through the open door?
Forgive yourself.
Now is the only time you have to be whole.
Now is the sole moment that exists to live in the light of your true Self.
Perfection is not a prerequisite for anything but pain.
Please, oh please, don’t continue to believe in your disbelief.
This is the day of your awakening.

Go In and In: Poems From the Heart of Yoga
~Danna Faulds

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My guests this morning want to help change all that.

Dargan Coggeshall is the Owner and Director, and Megan Richards is the Consultation Director of Learning RX, which is a local company that believes they can help train the brain and in so doing solve the causes, not just treat the “symptoms”, of learning disorders.

Good morning and thanks for joining me on Real Life. In many ways, for parents, nothing is more real than the difficulties confronting their children.  How big a problem is this?

http://www.learningrx.com/charlottesville/

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I am a shining example of the independent woman (and I’m singling myself out here for something that I’m not so proud of). I’ve lived all over the planet, mostly on my own. I’ve been a single mom since my son’s birth. I’ve started my own business. I bought my own house. Drive a nice little car. I now live alone…see a trend? “I can do it myself!”

During the Batesville Store show, we talked about the importance of community. It’s OK, in fact more so in rural life than urban, imperative to rely on each other.  After the show, I reflected on how I’m doing within the context of living in community.

This is what I uncovered–in order to depend on others, I must have the courage to be vulnerable. I have to have the courage to be disappointed or feel let down when the other person, can’t, or perhaps worse yet, doesn’t want to, fulfill my request. A few years ago, shortly after I had crushed my fingers in my bedroom window, I was at one of my most vulnerable moments, when I mustered up the courage to ask the friend who had come over to help me bathe, if she would drive me to my doctor’s appointment the next day. Flatly, she said, “No.” I dissolved into uncontrollable tears. I simply could not believe that she would deny me this request when clearly I needed help. I asked for what I want, or more scarily, what I needed. (I did find someone who was able to help me the next day.) While it wasn’t great reinforcement for my wanting to venture out into the land of vulnerability, I can also share with you that someone from the Batesville Store brought me soup that week. And another friend brought dinner. And many, many friends checked-in on me.

Today, after the show as I pulled into the parking area in front of my house (I live in the country, so I don’t have a clearly defined-by-macadam driveway), I re-visited a thought that I’ve had many time when I pull into that space–in order for a friend to be able to come visit me, I have to park in such a way that leaves enough space for them to be able to park their car. And I’m left with these questions:

PRACTICE: Where in my life am I not creating space for others to contribute to me? How can I make room to include community? Is it really more important to be alone than to be vulnerable?